...I love music. In all it's forms. I love it so much I hate it...
The earth is my country and your countries are my cities. I've heard it all. I will admit some styles are just goofy and don't earn the right to be listened too. I've gone to some cities where I want to reap the whole place because their national music is awful. Some I love to come back to, if not to reap, just to hang out. Music is something I always have on when I'm wandering the earth reaping. I still prefer my Sony Walkman or Discman. I hate the ipod, for personal reason, if the ipod becomes a person I will kill him. I love making compilations for different situations when I'm wandering the earth reaping. You need different soundtracks to different kills. Not everyone is the same nor is each situation. Killing becomes so creative with music as a soundtrack.
Music is like a woman to me. Unattainable perfection. She can be beautiful and graceful; full of feeling; challenge your intellect; be raw and common; down to earth; take you to place's you've never been and experience the unknown or be that calm comforting story you've heard a thousand times, but hearing it makes you relax, like with an old friend telling past stories. She can infuriate you; make you want to punch through walls and kill someone. Make you stand on the edge of a building and contemplate jumping. She is the laugh that makes you smile. The smile that makes your eyes light up. The innocent stare of a child or the sinister stare of a mass murderer. She is the calm breeze that drifts past you. She is a destructive tornado in the mist of a hurricane destroying everything that is in it's path. A still quiet river stream and a panic induced rumble of an earthquake. She is the light at the end of the tunnel and the darkness of a gun barrel staring at you when you take your last breath. She is a wet dream that causes pleasure and a nightmare that troubles you after you awake. She can make you dance when you don't want to; make you sing your lungs out, off key, in your car, not caring about who's next to you laughing. She can make you bang your head and play air-guitar and air-drums, like you know what you're doing. She'll embarrass you or make you feel indestructible. She is for war and peace. She'll make you cut yourself. She will make you do things you never thought you would. She can change your religion and your political views. She'll give you a history lesson or mindless information. She'll get stuck in your head humming an annoying lyric for hours and sometimes days. She is an answer on a test or a problem on a quiz. She'll teach you about love and rebellion; about hate and confrontation; about evil and Satan; about meditation and God. She can walk into a room elegantly dressed in make-up or kiss you half asleep with morning breath, hair tattered, in her pajamas. She is everything you want, but can never fully have. She is what you love and hate. Completely complimentary.
She is everything you want and you connect on so many levels, but there is always that doubt, because you can never seem to get to that one point that's missing. It's that unsatisfying emotion when it seems everything is right except that one thing you can never figure out. And so you try another one, and another one and so on, until you realize it's not them it's you, or not. You'll never be satisfied because they can't satisfy you. To find that one that you want continuously, that you need continuously and no other matter.
Then the day comes when you look at your collection, filled with so much "stuff." You look at it and wonder why do I have this, but you can't seem to give it up, because it brings some kind of memory, no matter how lame a release. It is like a picture of an ex you can't throw away for reasons unknown.
But the state of music today has become depressing; it's lost it's feeling; it's become generic on a wide range.; it's like walking into a store and everything is no brand. It's like shopping at Ross, cool if you want clothes, but not music.
Buying music has become like finding a date online, so many choices, but you know none of them are really any good. Some look good; some look interesting, so you try it out; some have a good review; some do a good interview, so you try it out; some have a good story; some you've sampled, so you try it out. And the majority of time they all suck. They waste your time or take it up until the next one.
There used to be a time when you could look at the cover of an album and by the artwork you knew it was going to be good. There used to be a time when you could trust a review. There used to be a time where you knew the music was going to be good because of what label it was on. But again like a woman you wonder what happened, what happened to girls that strived to be and are raised to be women or to be ladies. Now we are bombarded by views of girls that don't know how to hold themselves or conduct themselves. It seems it's become cool or now it's become acceptable to be foul mouthed, to fist fight, get drunk, be easy, slutty, uneducated, to be the "bitch."
But now I often wonder where you are; where have you gone; what you are doing; what happened? Are you lost and can I help you? If I could I'd be your saviour, because you saved me so many times.
Music where are you? My beautiful lady, my love, where have you gone. Who's raising your children. Who's bed are you sleeping in tonight? It's become blasphemy what masquerades as music. You've allowed yourself to be whored out. You prostitute yourself out for any amount of money, just for the chance of 15 seconds of fame, because 15 minutes is even more rare in music. You believe these suits in these high priced offices have your best interests at heart. They're only here for the buck. They will hurt you; take from you and continuously rape you. Don't sell yourself short. Don't do anything half-ass. Hold out. Create a masterpiece. Be proud of yourself. Don't go and live with him. It's about love, not the money. Run. Wait until you're married, make sure he's the right one.
Memories are great and sometimes needed, but we can't live in them. I want to know you now and again and continuously. I don't ever want to come home and look at you and be bored. I want to come home and look at you and say you are the most beautiful creation I have ever seen. I want you to always challenge me. I want to experience new things with you. I want you to satisfy me. I want to hold you; to feel you; to caress you. I want to listen to you; to hear you; to read you; to get to know you again. I want to love you again...
